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Have you seen the movies Sathiya and Chalte Chalte? These are simple love stories but they depict a stark reality of life. Be it love marriage or arranged marriage, the initial fervor of love is sure to get buried under the burden of responsibilities and practicalities of life. Then the cute love story of a boy met a girl, fell in love at first sight, said he would do anything to marry the girl, fought with his own parents, ran and got married and dreamt of staying happily in love forever, sounds like a fallacy.

Why does every love story meet the same fate? The reason is simple. Before you tie the knot, you can live in the fantasy land and dream about whatever you want to. In this journey you include your girlfriend or boyfriend also and everything looks rosy.  There is no responsibility except the craziness for each other. And the biggest factor is that you still are living separately and don’t have full control over each other. But the moment you get married, subconsciously you start taking your spouse for granted from day one. You don’t have to get ready to go and meet her/him in the evenings anymore. That person is with you 24 * 7.

Another important factor is that after marriage not only does your family, your society but even your spouse expects you to behave maturely and responsibly. They would no longer neglect your mistakes. You are required to behave as a reliable family member and expected to follow all the rules and regulations of the family.

It’s rightfully said that any kind of marriage can only work if there is mutual understanding and compatibility. The initial passion can only be sustained over the years by constant hard work. You cannot expect your spouse to keep showering sweet nothings on you till eternity. Every marriage has to sail through ups and downs and only those marriages survive the test of time which are build on strong foundation of trust, mutual respect and adjustments. Every marriage expects some level of compromise from both the partners. You have to nurture the values of humility and patience to make your marriage work. Love marriages can also work only if “I” changes to “us” and remains like that forever.

Tags: Arranged Marriage, Boy, Chalte Chalte, Family, Girl, Life, Love at First Sight, Love Marriage, Love Stories, Marriage, Parents, Relationship, Sathiya, Society

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Which one is better - Love marriage or arranged? The issue is debatable all over the globe especially in eastern countries where arrange marriage is a tradition. As you read this question which option strikes in your mind first and why?

Education and media played a vital role in changing the perception of the Indian mind. Love marriage is supposed to provide freedom and more independence as compared to arranged marriages where the girl/boy is chosen by the parents. The usual question of love marriage voters against arranged one is that how can anyone marry the person whom they don’t know?

Amid popular love lore like Soni Mahiwal, India always had a long tradition of arranged marriages. With the advent of the British and the subsequent introduction of British education system more Indians got educated. Education and exposure to the media, started to make people to think and realize they need not be bound by tradition and they can choose their own marital partners without having to rely on parents, matchmakers, relatives or having to consult astrologers. This gave rise to love marriages. Currently in our country we have arranged as well as love marriages taking place.

If we start comparing love and arranged marriages we will see that both has certain pros and cons. If we talk about the love marriages first, it provides time for a mutual understanding between the partners which is needed for any successful relation. Knowing somebody before marriage allows partners to have better respect and understanding for each other’s needs and desires. This way they are better adjusted in the marriage when they finally take their wedding vows. In arrange marriages, there is a pressure to conform to parental expectations like producing a male heir, taking part in family rituals and traditions, putting up with sisters-in-laws, contributing to family expenses etc. Lovers have to try hard if their parents don’t agree with the relation. That is why it is said that Love is not an easy way out!

As the partners are happy with their spouse and its their own decision to marry him/her, love marriages should be successful but not all love marriages have happy endings. Sometimes discord arises even in love marriages. After spending a happy time of marriage, the same couple can be seen regretting on their decisions. They found hard to save the marriage and at last have to break up. If they them self chosen their partner and had a perfect tuning then why this unhappy end of the relation after marriage?

Perhaps to avoid this kind of ending, now-a-days youngsters prefer arranged marriages. It is thought that arranged marriages happen only in the east but this was not always so arranged marriages were happening even in Victorian Europe. The best part in an arranged marriage is that parents and the family is happy and they them self arrange the marriage. There is no tears and no battle for their permission. Arrange marriage offer more protection and security to the women. There is not much pressure on the women to look like models. Parents employ maturity and wise judgment when choosing suitable spouses for their children.

Caste system gave birth to arrange marriages, as the upper caste families didn’t want their children to marry outside their community and caste. In some case, by love marriage people lost all things like parents, society and religion. But after World War II and industrial revolution people’s perception started changing and they became familiar with the concept of love marriages. Slowly but steadily, love marriages are acceptable in Indian society also.

To decide which one is ideal is an unending debate. Love or arranged both is based on empathy, responsibility, commitment, love and concern. A marriage needs a lot of dedication and effort to sustain the relation.

So there is nothing like an ideal marriage it’s all about the way you perceive your marriage. The target is the happiness and stability of the relation in the marriage whether it is love or arranged.

Tags: Arranged Marriage, India, Love, Marriage, Society

The controversial marriage issue of Bollywood star Sanjay Dutt with Manyata has finally got permission by the Session court in Mumbai. The Court dismissed Manyata’s former husband Mehraj Shaikh’s petition and said that the Manyata is divorced with his former husband and hence her marriage with Sanjay is legal.

Sanjay Dutt and Manyata had wed in Goa, and then again in Mumbai on February 11 but the marriage soon went soar when Manyata’s ex husband Meraz has claimed that Manyata has married Sanjay without being divorced with him. Hence the marriage is illegal. Bandra court approved this claim and their marriage was stated illegal there after.

Session court’s decision give relief to the couple and Dutt expressed his happiness over the judgment to the media at his home.

Tags: Bandra, Bollywood, Goa, Manyata, Marriage, Mumbai, Sanjay Dutt

There is a dramatic twist in the controversial marriage of Bollywood star Sanjay Dutt and Manyata. Both admitted in the Mumbai court today that their marriage was not authorized and they are not married legally.

They claimed that they have no legal proof for their marriage. The allegation laid by Manyata’s first husband Meraj Rehman who is under trial said in his petition that he is Manyata’s husband and the couple are not yet divorced. He claimed Manyata’s marriage with Sanjay is illegal.

Challenging the order of issuance against them, Sanjay and Manyata stated in their application on April 7 that their marriage in Goa is a nullity. The couple claimed that there is no final decision can be reached in lack of any legal proof.

Earlier, Dutt and Manyata were granted a reprieve till April 23 when the Mumbai Sessions Court stayed the proceedings against them by the Bandra court.

Additional Sessions Judge S.N. Sardesai admitted a revision application filed by Manyata and exempted the couple from appearing before the Bandra court April 15.

The two got married on February 7 in the court of Goa. But soon there marriage went sour when legal questions were thrown on the validity of the marriage. Manyata’s first husband claims and residential certificate validity issue of Manyata put the wedding under controversies.

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Tags: Manyata, Marriage, Sanjay Dutt

Sanjay, Manyata withdraw their marriage declaration through a joint declaration on Wednesday.

Bollywood actor Sanjay Dutt married Manyata on 7th February in a hotel of Goa before the South Goa Sub Registrar. But the marriage generated a lot of controversies with it and many troubles for the couple. A legal notice is also sent to Manyata on investigation of the residence certificate proof of her in Goa and asking for her explanation.

After these controversies, the marriage was put on hold and was under investigation. But now the couple had paid for the procedural lapses by withdrawing the marriage declaration.

Tags: Goa, Manyata, Marriage, Sanjay Dutt

Sanjay dutt and Manayata’s wedding is still in trouble for the legality of her Residence Certificate. A stay order was issued on 7th of this month and their wedding was temporarily brought to a stand still.

Manyata was blamed by Revenue Officials for providing a fraud residence certificate and hence a notice was issued against her asking to explain why her residence proof should not be cancelled? Hearing of this case will be on 7th March.

Manyata had stated that she has been staying at Aquem, a sub urban locality adjacent to South Goa’s Margao town.

It is known that purtagallies rules are followed in Goa and there are same old rules regarding any wedding. According to their law, a wife becomes the owner of half of her husband’s property after marriage. Registration of marriage is necessary in Goa. The couple has to sign a declaration for marriage which states the reason of their marriage. If there is no objection for the same within next 15 days marriage is granted. There is no such rule in other part of the country. With February 19 development, the couple’s marriage continues to be on hold. Hence the wedding is still in trouble.

Tags: Dispute, Manyata, Marriage, Sanjay Dutt